I always like summer, at some points.
The early morning of summer is always soft and pleasant. Like there’s nothing can break the summer’s tranquility. The ever-blue color spills all over the sky’s skin. The clouds are purely white like cotton candy. The sky of autumn is quite similar but summer’s morning sky is just happier and brighter. When looking at it, it makes me think about my future dreams and in a way, pumps up the energy in me to get ready for new things. I always want to start something out of ordinary with this fresh mood which only summer’s morning can bring.
However, the summer’s morning is not the thing that stirs my feelings the most.
For me, if summer’s morning lets me think of future, it’s the afternoon that reminisces my past and childhood. All the memories that seem to be hidden in a dusty corner now all show live before my eyes.
When I was a naughty child, my elder brother and I – like any other children at my age, always had to take a nap after lunch. But, we thought we children don’t need that much sleep. So, we waited till Mom fell asleep, silently unlocked the door and snuck out. As soon as the door was open, we must use all our effort to run as fast as we could. We usually went to my grandma’s house. She had a very big house with big play yard and a garden with mannnyyyyy delicious fruits.
If not climbing trees in her garden or picking up fruits or playing stuff with my sisters here, we would go cicadas-hunting or bird-hunting with a rubber crossbow in other gardens in the village. We even went playing in the temple although the elders always warned us about the saints here (like, we’d be punished if we are too noisy at the place where the saints rest).
Besides, my brother and I also spent time wandering from fields to fields, got both our hair and skin burnt under summer’s sunshine but we didn’t care. In the late afternoon, we would head back to my neighbor’s house with a big locust tree. Its shade covered all the yard and the gate – where we usually climbed up and chatted with other kids.
We only returned home when it’s really late (getting dark) or got caught by Mom. Of course, we’d be beaten up for sure if Mom found us. But we seemed to never learn our lesson. Once the pain disappeared we forgot what we did and still snuck out after that.
Grew a little older, I was bought a doll. From that time I spent my nap time to play doll, alone. I played all by myself exceptionally well. Not only playing doll but also playing seller-buyer, teaching (my students were the trees), house construction with the cards, I could play all of them all alone for hours without any bother. The “playgrounds” differed, from the 2nd floor’s balcony or the yard in front of my house, or the cement water tank, or the intermediate landing of the staircase. Wherever, as far as I pleased.
I kept playing dolls til 2007, hmmm when I was in 11th grade. A life event happened and if not for this event, maybe I still keep the dolls and other stuff like the doll’s house and her clothes and perhaps I still play dolls now (I freaking loved playing dolls back then).
That day is the day that I have been repeating again and again in my own diary and blogs. No problem, I will repeat talking about that day, there’s nothing wrong with that. That day was Saturday 7th of July, 2007. Yes, I received an offline message via Yahoo (a very popular chat application at that time) from my crush (he didn’t know I like him). The message told me that he loves me. Oh my God! I was breathless. Exploded with happiness.
Is there anything could make a naive and all alone high-school girl dreamer happier than being loved back by the one she has been loving from 6th grade? Because I was so happy, the next morning when I was playing with my dolls, Mom said “you’re too old for that” I wholeheartedly agreed (yes, I’m going to have my 1st love, I’m so grown up, Mommy – I really thought that haha). I acted in a very mature way – I believed – by taking all the dolls and little girl’s stuff for the neighbor’s younger girls. I only kept the doll I loved most and dressed her in the best clothes.
And the next day, after I replied him that I’d been in love with him, he sent me another offline message that it was someone else using his mail and made a fool out of me. And he said Sorry. I was actually really shocked. And totally crashed down with embarrassment. I felt like I’m the biggest fool on earth and just wanted to be disappeared.
Now each time seeing the doll through the glass of the shelf, it makes me feel so nostalgic. And each year’s 7th July comes also makes me remember this event. Honestly, when writing these lines, I’m still embarrassed. So, I guess I’ll talk about it over and over again until I don’t feel ashamed at all, really!
It’s so hot. That’s so summer. There’s still wind blowing in a few seconds but it runs away so quickly and I’m still sweating. I’m sitting right at the place where 2 years ago, I used to sit to review the knowledge for the university’s graduation exam. That time, the peach bore some fruits and I ate all of them. It was around May or June. Now it’s already August, haha.
Wah, there are so many white clouds. In those beautiful old days, I usually sat on the balcony to watch the cloud (yep, in a very cool way that guys usually sit). I just sat there and let my soul and my thoughts saturated into the flow of the river of clouds. And I found it kinda interesting to guess which shape is which animal. Oh, this one looks like a bear, oh and that one looks like a farmer. Hmmm, not really close. How about a duck? Right now on my head is a dog made by cloud with a skull head.
Anyhow, I love summer just for the early mornings of motivation and the afternoon of memories! Especially like this, when I have a very private space to reminisce the old days while listening to a beautiful song.