don't make assumptions
365 Days Of Writing,  Self Growth

Don’t Make Assumptions

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Friendly and helpful self-reminder for all of us – Let’s read these lines from The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and practicing asking questions rather than let assumptions become real in our head.

“We have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth. We could swear they are real. We make assumptions about what others are doing or thinking — we take it personally — then we blame them and react by sending emotional poison with our word. That is why whenever we make assumptions, we’re asking for problems. We make an assumption, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing.”

“Because we are afraid to ask for clarification, we make assumptions; then we defend our assumptions and try to make someone else wrong. It is always better to ask questions than to make an assumption, because assumptions set us up for suffering.”

Learn to asks and be clear about what you’ve heard

“These assumptions are made so fast and unconsciously most of the time because we have agreements to communicate this way. We have agreed that is is not safe to ask questions; we have agreed that if people love us, they should know what we want or how we feel. When we believe something, we assume we are right about it to the point that we will destroy relationships in order to defend our position.”

We make the assumption that everyone sees life the way we do. We assume that others think the way we think, feel the way we feel, judge the way we judge, and abuse the way we abuse. This is the biggest assumption that humans make. And this is why we have a fear of being ourselves around others. Because we think everyone else will judge us, victimize us, abuse us, and blame us as we do ourselves. So even before others have a chance to reject us, we have already rejected ourselves.

Quoted from this medium post.

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A digital marketer, blogger, freelancer, astrology fan, mommy of a lovely elephant and helpless Japan-lover. Or just call me Vivian. Hope you have a good time up above the cloud with me.

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